This is inspired by Aisling’s post about a week ago. I took on her challenge and have come up with a list of 10 things that are kind of essential about me.
- Lover of justice.
- Mean streak a mile wide and deeper still.
- Addictive personality.
- Superiority complex.
This list is actually fairly short and doesn’t really do me justice, but it was hard enough to come up with these ten items and still be brutally honest. My boyfriend jokingly suggested that I put down “ash and carbon” because if we immolated me that’s all that would be left, and so is “quintessentially me”. (Har, har.)
So. I could post this list and be done with the post (which seems lazy, but really isn’t, because it took me about 20 minutes to come up with the list items) or I could elaborate a little bit. Elaboration seems a bit more fun.
- If you’re surprised about this you really haven’t been paying attention, m’dears.
- Some things never really truly mend. I’ve been glued back together more times than I can count but not all wounds are in the flesh or bone; not all can knit back together. I’ll always be a bit broken.
- I have elements of Ravenclaw and Gryffindor, but at heart I’m a snake.
- This will never stop being true of me, and if I lost use of my hands my life would be over.
- Yup. I do not like budging.
- I get this from my oma and my dad. Though oma’s mean streak was more hurtful, because it came out of the fucking blue so often. With dad you just kind of expect it.
- This is my gender identity, and that’s a huge part of who I am.
- I get addicted to everything.
- I also think I’m smarter and better than most people on the planet.
There you go. That’s Morag in a nutshell.
It’s important to know things about yourself and to be honest about it when you’re walking certain paths. Many pagan paths leave no room for self-delusion, and if you cling to lies you’ll find them savagely ripped from you at some point.
(Or you’ll alienate everyone around you because no one likes a pompous douchebag.)
It hurts, and it’s difficult, but it’s necessary. Figure out some key points about who you are. Doesn’t have to be all key points — we’re always evolving and changing, and knowing yourself is a work in progress. But have something, some points to anchor yourself to.
I challenge you to participate in this exercise too. It’s not as easy as it looks, but it’s helpful.
See you later this week, when I hopefully post the rest of the PBP letters I’m behind on (B, G, G, H, H, I, J, L, L).